I am so happy at the fact that I started out not planning to have any adings (little bros/sisters) and now finding out that I got both the people I wanted. Hehehe. I am real happy with both these two people’s personalities—- Tina, my girl-ading-to-be, who surprisingly looks as young or younger than me, is so incandescently positive, sweet, and bubbly! As of Aaron, my boy-ading-to-be, is such a gentleman. :) He is a smart, nice boy. I really hope to develop a wonderful relationship with these two little ones,
Who would’ve thought this ading would get adings?!
I believe in God because he answers my prayers. I am not over exaggerating by saying that he answers all of them. There have been many times when he probably said, “I’ll say yes to that and grant your prayer”. But there are also times when he says no to the things I ask and there are times when he says ‘no for now, but maybe later’. Regardless, he answers all of them.
I think for most of my life I’ve practice and believed but I never took it to heart. Recently though, my faith has strengthen. And ever since then I’ve been happier and more content. Definitely no Jesus freak because I have sinned over&over&over. But I’m working on opening my heart, being less judgmental, and letting His will be done. :)
Christine was driving through an intersection when she accidentally turned too sharmply and sidewiped another car. Worse yet, she was driving her brand-new car, a wedding gift from her husband Eric. Christine pulled over to the side of the road and the driver of the other car, an older gentleman, got out of hiscar and began to examine his severely damaged front bumper. Then he stepped over to where Christine was sitting in her car, crying.
“Are you okay, young lady?” He asked kindly.
“I’m fine,” Christine sobbed, “but I just got married and my husband gave me this car as a weding gift, he is going to be so upset. I don’t know what I’m going to do.”
“Oh, I’m sure it will be okay.” The older gentleman tried to console her. “Your husband will understand.” They talked for a few minutes before he said, “If O could get your insurance information, we’ll exchange that, and be on our way.”
“I don’t even know if I have an insurance card, Christine said through her tears.
“Well, it is usually in the glove compartment,” the man suggested. “Why don’t you check there?”
Christine opened the glove compartment and found the owner’s registration and insurance information. Attached to the envelope containing the insurance card was a note that read, “Honey, just in case you ever have an accident, please remember I love you and not the car.”
That’s the kind of person I want to be— a person who shows mercy, even in advance of a mistake or a wrong action. Rather than flaunting somebody’s failure, learn to cover some of those weakness in the people who are close to you.
One chance, two chances, three chances, four chances, five chances, and I must be stupid beyond reason if I give a sixth chance.
I refuse to feel the same pain I felt last year and I must detach myself from the future that I fantasize, because as of right now I know I wouldn’t want to be in a friendship or relationship or companionship who will continue to hurt me with the same reason.
I pray morning and night. I pray for what I am thankful for and I can’t lie— I pray for God to grant me the things I want. Sometimes he does, sometimes he doesn’t. But that’s all part of his plan right?
Work isn’t going that great for me. One of my managers isn’t exactly the nicest, and considering the fact that I’m really slow I find myself getting hot in embarrassment because I can’t catch on. I tell myself, only five more weeks and I’ll be done and I can focus on my studies.
I have been living in the shadows of fear. I find myself being scared to do something even though I know that by being that someone, I’ll be a better person. I need to overcome that fear.
So my dad comes home from work and we’re all upstairs cleaning (My grandma from the Philippines is coming tomorrow yay!). Anyway, he works at the music center in DTLA and he told us that he came across an usher who’s a year younger than I am who was crying. My dad, being the considerate person that he is, approached him and asked him what’s wrong. They talked and he basically told him his life story.
Up to being ten years old, he had a perfect and normal family. This was until his mother cheated on his father for a guy, and the father shot his wife in the back and is now serving time in jail. As of his mother, she abandoned him and his sister. Ever since he’s been moving from foster parent to foster parent and eventually his sister abandoned him. At 23, she married just to get away from the hardships of living from foster home to foster home.
With that story, I honestly thank God of how fortunate and blessed I am. I must keep in mind that I am fortunate that I have a roof under my head, food to eat, and most importantly a complete and happy family. I don’t think I would survive emotionally if I was in that situation. I really wish that I can help him in some way, but for now prayers is all I can give him. I guess another reminder is that I have to give back because I am constantly given fortunes and blessing from Him.
In the pursuit of trying to make things workout, I realized that this is a sign that I should not invest so much of my worries on what will never change. This summer, my goal is to realize that my happiness for the day shouldn’t be based on how many words are exchanged, let alone the substance of the conversation. The more I try, the more I realize that it’ll be harder for me, and the more monotonous our connection will be. I should just accept the circumstances of this relationship.
Looking back at these Tumblr posts, I would definitely say that this year with Christian has been a fluctuation of UPS and downs. The hardships and struggles that we faced— although not as bad as some couples— have affected me both negatively and positively. There were many instances where I was an inch away from giving up because we fought about the same things and the progression came slowly. Our differences, although not great, were significant enough to make us distant towards each other. I found myself crying so much over things I shouldn’t be crying about it and during times when I should be focusing on academics. I realized that through the struggles, it has made me stronger. It made me feel independent and I did not crave for being with him constantly, because his absence made me appreciate the times I did see him. Those moments we shared when we were together, even if it’s just laying in bed for hours at a time, were something I lived for.
What was significant about yesterday [Christian’s birthday] is that it served as a culmination of all the good and bad times that we faced. It’s super cheesy, but I can honestly say that through the good and bad times, love never fails. I always have to keep in mind that whatever we go through as a couple is completely normal. The doubt, the jealousy, the pain is something that we must go through to become an even better couple.
In a gist, all we did was eat and bond. But spending twenty four hours with him was a great way to appreciate the fact that being with him is a blessing and, although he is not religious, God can easily take this blessing away from me. It’s hard arguing with him whenever I see him. It hurts me when I find myself talking and talking and talking about what has bothered me in his car and crying like there’s no tomorrow. But gosh, I’m honestly happy that I have a man like Christian. We’re not that great right now, but we strive to be. We got lots of time.
I was so overwhelmed yesterday thinking about this. It’s summer and I’m gonna miss him. He’s going to summer school at Riverside while I’m here in Los Angeles. But I don’t know, yesterday made me realize that when I do see him, I’m gonna make that day special for both of us.
"Through the good and bad times, love never fails"
Saturday, June 9, 2012 - You may be quite sentimental about your memories today as a current experience reminds you of a forgotten past event. Unfortunately, nostalgia isn’t emotionally fulfilling now, so you might look forward to the big changes ahead. Think before you speak, and be careful that your outspoken approach doesn’t hurt an old friend or lover. Ultimately, letting go of the past allows you to move freely into the future.